For Hallett Elementary School students whose parents are going through a separation or divorce, counselors Tami Earthman and Ashlee King are once again putting together a “Going Through Changes” support group.
The group will meet for 30 minute sessions on Tuesday or Thursday for eight weeks.
Earthman, who has been running the group at Hallett for 20 years, said the idea is to show students whose family is experiencing a divorce that they are not alone.
“It gives kids a forum and an opportunity to talk about their life with people who are objective listeners,” Earthman said. “There’s no judgement (in the group).”
Earthman said one of the first things students learn is that the separation or divorce between their parents is not their fault.
“They learn that they should not blame themselves for the conflict and both their parents love them very much,” she added.
The group also discusses the different emotions students may feel about the change happening in their families how to express those feelings and ways to stay uninvolved in their parents’ conflicts. It also helps students deal with changes happening around the household before, during and after a divorce.
“There are different economics in the household and kids might have more chores to do,” Earthman said.
One of the materials Earthman uses for the group is Laurie Kransy Brown’s “Dinosaurs Divorce.” The book depicts different aspects of divorce, living with a single parent, holidays at two separate households and adjusting to a stepparent.
“I’ll probably go through one page at a time,” Earthman said. “The discussion between the kids is the main component of the group.”
Earthman said there is no fighting or arguing during sessions and students “can pass” their turn during discussions. The group also emphasizes confidentiality — what is shared in the group, stays in the group or at home.
“The students will share things that they don’t want anyone else to know,” Earthman said.
Earthman said students need to have their parents’ permission to join the group. The group is open to all students who have gone through divorce, even if it happened several years ago.
“There are some students who will do it (join the group) yearly,” Earthman said.
MORE INFO
For more information on Hallett’s “Going Through Changes” group, contact the office at (509) 565-2328, email Tami Earthman at tearthman@mlsd.org or Ashlee King at aking@mlsd.org.
Al Stover can be reached at al@cheneyfreepress.com.
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