When I was a little girl, I lived a magical life. Like a fairy princess.... Never mind, you already know that’s baloney. I remember a time when I was so disillusioned by whatever my parents were doing that I wanted to run away. Now I’m a planner and always have been. So it should come as no surprise that at a tender young age of four or five, I carefully planned my escape from my captors, Mom and Dad. I have no idea what they did to deserve such a punishment as me denying them my delightful presence. It must have been so bad that I blocked it from my memory.

So one evening I decided it...